Love me like I do !!!

Photo by Lisa Fotios on Pexels.com

Lynn was missing her mother very much but why she dint know,  it had been around 30 years yet she missed her so much, why ? Why would she cry and remember her ? Why now ?

She had everything   love, a family , a  job and she was already soul searching moving forward on her path slowly but steadily, yet, it was something that was missing from her life. “Does everyone feel the same at some point in their lives when they miss what they don’t have, yearn for it, cry over it and make themselves sad”  she thought to herself. She started pondering over this as she usually did,  ” I am sure they do sometime or another in their lives, the only thing varying would be their depth of thought which would of-course vary from one person to another and one time to another, as nothing stays the same forever” she thought again.

Yet the question was still there infront of her WHY  or maybe that wasnt the question she should be asking herself, it should be WHAT is it exactlythat was she missing ? Yes that was the question !!! Was it her childhood or was it her memories of her mother or was it just LOVE. Yes it was !!!! It was the unconditional love of the mother towards her child that no matter what happens in her own life she never stops loving or showing and expressing her love towards her child. This unconditional constant source of love,  where else can one find it in people in today’s world where everything seems temporary and all relationships tend to end somewhere due to whatever reason. “Is constant love even possible ?”  she thought.

It’s like being in one constant state of mind all the time which practically is not possible in today’s world where our minds are run by external things and attitudes and conditions and our inner state of love is never reflected out. Then what is it that she could do ? She immersed herself into this question not forgetting that nothing stays the same in today’s world especially with values in today.  She went deep into her thoughts and once again realizing that that wasn’t the question she should be asking, the actual question was that why is she looking for love outside of herself ? 

Did she love herslef  for who she was ?

If she did she would automatically be filled with it and she would be LOVE herself. What was possible though was being grateful for what she  had  “YES right that was possible for her to do” she thought. She had to restart being grateful for what she had, as she remembered the time not so far away in the past when she was grateful and hence happy.

There was her answer “LOVE me like I do”

Only two steps, though easier said than done but had to be done.

  1. Being grateful for what she had.
  2. To love herself in order to be in love with herself  and hence BE LOVE

And if YOU are LOVE, You spread Love,

And if YOU spread Love, You emit LOVE

And if YOU emit love, You emit Love energy,

If YOU emit Love energy, You inspire and heal others,

If YOU  inspire and heal others They themselves become LOVE,

If they themselves become LOVE the story continues forever …………………

The Struggle


In today’s world where there is so much tension of finances, jobs, household cleaning, maintaining relationships, maintaining a status, kids studies, balanced foods, exercising , relaxing and so many other issues that our minds are bombarded with. How many times in a day do you seriously have a feel of life’s simple pleasures? Why is it that those moments seem nothing yet we feel there is so much tension and work to be done in life. People like me who are analytical or the thinkers or the HSP find it so hard to merely exist in today’s world. Every single day is a struggle to survive and there are very few days where there is a sense of satisfaction of living and being alive. Why is it in today’s time when there is so much technology and growth in all fields we still feel that there is no peace, love and enjoyment and we drift more towards alcohol or drugs or else depression? Why is it that this temporary happiness seems the happy moments of life without realizing that slowly we are turning into alcoholics or drug addicts or constant sense of self worthlessness and that we feel there is no life without it?

There is so much happening in our lives that we hardly give credit to the amount of things we do in the day. A mere daily existence which includes innumerous tasks become null and void and then days at end they turn into monotonous household work or nothing. One of the main reasons for this is that we don’t respect and acknowledge the things we do in a day and we do same for other special members of the family and as a result we take everyone and everything for granted. We actually bury ourselves under the mere existence of life.

Since there is so much that seems like work we tend not to enjoy the small pleasures that life brings us. In this turmoil of life events we tend not to appreciate what we have and as a result develop a habit of complain or tantrum or cribbing or whatever name you want to give it. We get so addicted to it that sometimes small inner happiness seems nothing to us. We all have been told that the happiness is within us it’s because we look outside we feel things are missing and we are living in the world of deprivation rather than abundance. How , how are we to feel all this when are minds and hearts are clogged with tension, hate, jealousy and all the other emotions that we attach negative connotations to. We digress towards alcohol or spending time with people outside our family or circle and there are more and more of drugs and alcohol and extra marital affairs… why ?

The reason is simple we always want a little excitement in our lives and that we get from things outside of us as we ourselves are buried under the drama of life we have created ourselves or due to the society we live in. It is like a teenager living under peer pressure accepts things that are not good for him due to it.

So inorder to reduce this tension, drama and the buried grave of ourselves we need to thrive for things that give us small pleasures in life and learn the art of satisfaction without having to compete with society / anything or anybody ways of living or pressures. The art of knowing who we really are at the core which often we don’t know, we would have known what simple things we could do in our current situation that would make us feel complete or happy or fulfilled.

So let’s start with finding out who we are at core in this new Year and move forwards to a more satisfying life ahead. It’s high time for change. Work with me during this new year to go step by step all the way into creating the change and Re-Inventing Yourself.

Your Calling !!!!


Today while I was doing meditation a sudden feeling of calm and peace dawned on me and I wondered how many of us get caught up in the drama of life and loose this simple necessity of life. We are all at different phases of life where it might be essential to devote time to other needs of life like work (finances are important), kids n other half (family is important) and social commitments (social life is important) but what is the ultimate goal of life?

Is that what you came here to do?

Each of us is here to take care of a certain task without which the world would not be the world we live in and so it is important to find that path too and once we start travelling that path a sense of achievement, happiness and calmness will automatically dawn on you. Many people say it’s difficult, yes it is who said life is a bed of no thorn roses, even the roses have thorns. So your calling will come but at the right time when you are destined to move into it. One thing is sure that Universe does give you loads of suggestions, intuitions and guidance and it is upto you to take it. It is upto you to open up to frequencies of the universe.

Having said that it doesn’t mean that we are not on our way to our calling, each and every situation, circumstance, event or people who come into our lives make us what we have to become. We learn and grow with it and move on our path to attaining our goals, the only condition, you discover where you are going and where you want to be else you will be going in circles without identifying and enjoying the journey or the goal of your life.

Have trust and faith and tune in your vibes to frequencies of the Universe and your calling will become clear to you.


Loads of Blessings and Best Wishes


Expectations !!!

We often get used to a particular way of living and when things change with people their perceptions change  too. The change in the environment causes us to behave in a different manner and our values, priorities change. A person who is not in the same environment finds it hard to understand the change and they expect the person to have same priorities, perceptions and way of behaving which was earlier there. This leads to expectations and crashing …which leads to issues between people and their relationships

This being human nature is completely ok and natural, nobody needs to feel sad or upset because of this.

Now the question arises if it is natural and ok then what is the solution ?

The solution lies in communication…where the change in the situation and change in priorities is expressed, the only condition being that both people involved have to have a healthy open communication and try to understand each others perspective.

The solution is though simple yet difficult to follow as those two people are different from one another and the way they perceive and think and do things is different. Thus something that seems trivial to one since his/her situation has changed might seem illogical/different/important to another. This is the reason why it is so easy to start any relationship yet difficult to maintain, something similar to giving birth to a child is different from the way you raise it. Raising a child has its own growing issues which keep changing with time and as parents one needs to constantly change the way to handle it or understand it.

Also important point to remember is that if we want people to do certain things we are expecting from them to do it in a particular way which may or may not hold true/valuable to another in his/her current changed situation. So be mindful of the expectations. When the thin line of expectation,respect and understanding between two people changes it leads to unsatisfied relationships.


Balance between expectations and understanding must be achieved for healthy relationships !!!

Destiny !!!!


I am inspired to write a story as if everything in the Universe is compelling me to, the feeling is uncannily similar to being a writer who evolves himself with his writings.

” What is it about this morning that gives me a vision of  being a writer ? ” thought Sally.

She had heard and read a lot about the visions in life one gets and she felt  as if she was actually dreaming about it or as if it was happening right in front of her and as if Universe was guiding her to do something, and that she had to open up to these possibilities. It was as if even the plant on her table was telling her to be inspired by its green foliage which was so subtle and serene. She had never felt anything like this before, she had heard many people talk and write about opening ones  frequencies and accepting what needs to be done rather than fighting it. Maybe it was her destiny that things, though not perfect, were falling into place slowly and gradually, at a pace which was slow for her, but maybe it was time  for Universe to have its own way. She suddenly had a vision of her signing her own book. She never thought that a simple story to start with would bring her to this vision and so she followed her heart and her vision and she was all set to attract her own destiny.

Sometimes there are moments like these which we need to embrace and let go of our limitations and just be in the moment and trust the Universe or the higher power to lead us. There are also times when we are too distressed only to block certain pathways by the universe, So trust the Universe and the higher power and it shall attract Your Destiny to YOU.


Changing Habits

Some Beliefs Make Changing Habits More Difficult

It’s crucial to integrate the new methods that are being discussed in these  blogs into your daily routine. Reading these blogs without applying the new  concepts is like taking a boat across a river, but not getting out on the other  side.

The first step in changing habits is to investigate how your belief system  influences your behavior. When you were a child you were probably taught by your  parents, teachers, peers and the media that you can only be happy if you live a  stimulating life based on outer gratification such as making a lot of money,  finding the perfect mate and achieving success at work. Looking for happiness  and trying to obtain a feeling of self-worth only from outside stimuli can  create anxiety and tension for the reflective, sensitive person.

It’s vital to deeply examine your life goals as you begin to understand that  what you truly desire is inner-peace and that nothing in this constantly  changing world can really give you lasting contentment. Life is temporary and  everything will eventually leave you. You can’t take money, a partner or job  status with you when you leave your body, so begin to look inside to make the  necessary changes that will create inner-peace and happiness today.

Being Highly Sensitive And Changing Habits

You were probably told that there was something inherently wrong with you as  a child for being so sensitive. You may have internalized that false belief,  creating an addictive, self-fulfilling prophecy, subconsciously identifying with  emotional pain. Most self-defeating behavior is based on not loving  yourself.

I frequently encounter sensitive clients who have told me that it’s difficult  to let go of an untenable situation, even when it’s creating enormous pain in  their lives. There was a highly sensitive woman I counseled whose noisy upstairs  neighbors were literally driving her crazy, yet she would always make up an  excuse not to move. An HSP man told me that he worked for an abusive boss, yet  steadfastly refused to look for another job. Most people who remain in  emotionally destructive situations believe that they deserve to suffer due to  low self-esteem, which is based on the untruth that there is something wrong  with them.

Once you begin to understand the base of your belief system, you will be  aware of how your internalized beliefs influence your thought patterns. There is  a saying: “Sow a thought, reap an action; sow an action reap a habit; sow a  habit; reap a character.”

Practical Considerations About Changing Habits

When changing habits you need to be gentle with yourself and make the changes  slowly. For example, if you try to stop an overeating habit cold turkey by going  on a crash diet, you may end up eating the cold turkey and all the trimmings. If  you want to go to bed an hour earlier to obtain more sleep, try going to bed  just five minutes earlier each night so that in a few weeks, you will reach your  goal.

Once you have changed your consciousness by internalizing new positive  values, you will spontaneously make changes to create more inner-peace and joy  in your life. Also, It’s much easier to change habits when you are receiving  support from other people than trying to make the changes alone. Besides  enlisting support from your relatives, friends and co-workers, you can attend a  support group such as a 12-step program or individual counseling.

You need to use our will power to change habits. Make a list of the areas  that are causing you pain and use your volition to write down the new methods  that you will employ to alleviate any tension and unhappiness in your life. As  you begin having small victories in changing habits, your will power will be  strengthened. You can also increase your inner-strength through visualization,  and the use of affirmations. Make a resolution today that you will no longer  remain in any environment in which there is no hope for you to be happy.

Supportive Environments Are Critical For Changing Habits

However, since environment may be stronger than your will power to change,  you also need to remove yourself from situations that reinforce negative habits  and low self-esteem. Your home and work environment are the most important  factors that determine your ability to create a peaceful life, so it’s  imperative that you create a harmonious work and home atmosphere. If you know  that a certain environment creates anxiety, either try to change the unhealthy,  over-stimulating situation or remove yourself from the source of tension.

I have noticed that you can generally replace a bad habit with a good one in  just six months. One HSP client, Felicia, told me that when she began  meditating, after several months that practice became a part of her life, just  like brushing her teeth when she awoke. Felicia said that if she is unable to  meditate in the morning, she doesn’t feel centered until she experiences at  least ten minutes of deep relaxation. She noticed that when she’s feeling calm,  little daily annoyances become less significant. Once you become focused on  establishing peace of mind, you won’t have to give others a piece of your  mind.

Finally, you need to create new, satisfying and nurturing activities to  replace the old habits. For example, if you decide to watch less overstimulating  TV and DVDs and spend less time being bombarded by stimuli on the Internet, you  could begin reading calming, spiritually-uplifting books. This is a new year for  you and you don’t have to keep repeating old habits that don’t work for you  anymore as you gain new knowledge and understanding of yourself

Step By Step Roadmap: How to Change  Habits

1. Investigate your belief system and become aware when a habit creates  pain.

2. Be gentle with yourself by changing habits slowly.

3. Try to always be aware of the goal of developing a change of  consciousness.

4. Enlist the support of your family, friends, co-workers, neighbors; you may  want to meet with a counselor or join a support group.

5. Remove yourself from an environment that reinforces negative habits.

6. Realize that in only six months you can replace a bad habit with a good  one through daily practice.

7. Create new, satisfying and nurturing activities to replace the old  habits.

8. Use your will power to develop a structured program for yourself to help  make positive life-style changes.

9. Write down and implement the changes that you want to make as you read  these blogs

Acknowledgements : http://www.hsphealth.com/blog/2013/01/changing-habits/#ixzz2HNCEKgJe

Wishing you All a Very Happy New Year 2013

As we enter New Year its time to set New Goals filled with hope and dreams !

So let’s get going and set S.M.A.R.T. Goals !!!!


S : Specific

M: Measurable

A: Attainable

R: Realistic

T: Timely / Tangible         


Specific:  A specific goal has a much greater chance of being accomplished than a general goal. To set a specific goal you must answer the six “W” questions:

*Who: Who is involved?

*What: What do I want to accomplish?

*Where: Identify a location.

*When: Establish a time frame.

*Which: Identify requirements and constraints.

*Why: Specific reasons, purpose or benefits of accomplishing the goal.

EXAMPLE: A general goal would be, “Get in shape.” But a specific goal would say, “Join a health club and workout 3 days a week.”

Measurable – Establish concrete criteria for measuring progress toward the attainment of each goal you set.

When you measure your progress, you stay on track, reach your target dates, and experience the exhilaration of achievement that spurs you on to continued effort required to reach your goal.

To determine if your goal is measurable, ask questions such as……

How much? How many?

How will I know when it is accomplished?

Attainable– When you identify goals that are most important to you, you begin to figure out ways you can make them come true. You develop the attitudes, abilities, skills, and financial capacity to reach them. You begin seeing previously overlooked opportunities to bring yourself closer to the achievement of your goals.

You can attain most any goal you set when you plan your steps wisely and establish a time frame that allows you to carry out those steps. Goals that may have seemed far away and out of reach eventually move closer and become attainable, not because your goals shrink, but because you grow and expand to match them. When you list your goals you build your self-image. You see yourself as worthy of these goals, and develop the traits and personality that allow you to possess them.

Realistic– To be realistic, a goal must represent an objective toward which you are both willing and able to work. A goal can be both high and realistic; you are the only one who can decide just how high your goal should be. But be sure that every goal represents substantial progress.

A high goal is frequently easier to reach than a low one because a low goal exerts low motivational force. Some of the hardest jobs you ever accomplished actually seem easy simply because they were hard labour.

Timely – A goal should be grounded within a time frame. With no time frame tied to it there’s no sense of urgency. If you want to lose 10 lbs /Kgs , when do you want to lose it by? “Someday” won’t work. But if you anchor it within a timeframe, “by May 1st”, then you’ve set your unconscious mind into motion to begin working on the goal. Your goal is probably realistic if you truly believe that it can be accomplished. Additional ways to know if your goal is realistic is to determine if you have accomplished anything similar in the past or ask yourself what conditions would have to exist to accomplish this goal.

T can also stand for Tangible  –  A goal is tangible when you can experience it with one of the senses, that is, taste, touch, smell, sight or hearing.

When your goal is tangible you have a better chance of making it specific and measurable and thus attainable.

Acknowledgements :


Judgements !!!

Hello All,

I am writing the first time in this new year so first of all I wish you a Happy and Prosperous year ahead.

The topic that struck my mind this evening was that of being Judgemental.

It is human nature to be curious and to learn and as we grow in life we tend to gather our thoughts, ideas, ideologies and perceptions. As we grow we tend to think and differentiate right from wrong and loose the child within us, the child who had no judgments but just pure heart.  A child who is often representation of God in some cultures and the reason being that child does not differ or pass judgments on others because he/she is in the purest form of life and just understands how to enjoy the gift of GOD.

A child is someone we need to learn from because it is in childhood that change and acceptance comes so easy. A child who is easy to mould into a mould of human choice like a spirit which needs to be moulded into loving the humanity and eternity in purest form.

We in our lives tend to forget how many judgements we pass in each day without even realising how hurtful it can or maybe to others, how it could ruin someones identity, how it could turn ones life around. It is these judgements that could change the course of life for anyone making a person drive to depression, negativity and loss of self  identity.

 It is very important to be aware of what are our perceptions are and that they could differ from those of others. It is what one learns from ones experiences over period of time and so it differs from experiences of others and hence perceptions of others. When we pass judgement all we say is our perception is the right one without respecting or understanding the perception of others.

So being mindful is very important aspect of being in a community, a community which needs positivity, growth, development and that can come only when we respect experiences of others and learn from them rather than having to go through them ourselves and thus become a more evolved human being.

 It is being Non judgemental the highest form of  purity and eternity and the ultimate gift to hmanity. 

Have a great day/evening.

Be Well

Coach Nupur.

 The Fear Factor


As Sheila was fighting with the thought of going to the doctor for small thing such as a corn on her feet , it was the thought of her having to go through the surgery to remove it that was freaking her out. Imagine if she would have told somebody of the thoughts that were bruising her mind they would laugh at her, but it was the word surgery that was overwhelming for her. Actually it was after she had gone through six surgeries of which two were major ones the word had developed a negative impact on her. She somehow mustered up the courage to go to the doc anyways, since it was something she was avoiding for past one month and it was giving her so much pain that she was not able to walk properly without pain.

As she was waiting for the doc in the clinic her heart was pounding, what if the doc says he has to do surgery, how would she be able to handle all the responsibilities that lay on her shoulders. It was then that she was asked to come in and the doc told her it was not a corn but internal infection which needs to be operated, it was exactly what she did not want to hear. She felt like her heart is going to sink and so many different questions starting raving her mind especially when the doc said we can do it right away it just takes 10 minutes.

10 min, now ,oh my God “ thought Sheila 

It is just a 10 min laser treatment and no precautions required after that except some antibiotic cream application. You would need four such treatments” said the doc. 

Oh, OK ” she thought, the word treatment was word that did not frighten her and was much easier to handle. As she lay on the bed for her foot to be treated the fear sprung up again in her mind like a demon but with two pin pricking shots all was over.

 You can walk home now Sheila “ said the doc. 

That’s it !!! She thought, “Wow, that was quick and everybody else had scared me by saying I have to undergo surgery for this” she told the doc and, he smiled back at her.  

Suddenly all her fear had vanished and she returned home put the antibiotic cream and sat on the couch thinking with a cup of coffee in her hands. 

She started wondering how sometimes some particular words have such an impact on us and how fear of something can take over our lives and block us from living it to the fullest. She thought how life has its own ways of teaching and if we learn from it we would know how to handle it the next time it springs up its head again.

  • You can conquer almost any fear if you will only make up your mind to do so. For remember, fear doesn’t exist anywhere except in the mind. – Dale Carnegie  


  • Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy. – Dale Carnegie


  • Confront your fears, list them, get to know them, and only then will you be able to put them aside and move ahead. – Jerry Gillies

 Acknowledgements :

Photographer – Andy Newson

Site : http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/Younger_Women_g57-Scared_p983.html

The Blame Game !!!!


The Blame Game




Whenever we point fingers at others most of the fingers point towards us !!!







Often I find all of getting stuck in what is called the Blame game which makes us feel better to blame others for the situation that we are in today. There are certain situations which definitely are not in our control and beyond the boundaries of human expectations while there are some in which we blame others for bringing us to that point.

Let us try and analyze that situation in your life.

If you were to imagine a particular situation that you are or were in where you thought it was someone else’s fault and look at the situation again and experience all that went into creating the situation and then, ask yourself :

How is other responsible for the situation that you are in ?

How are you responsible for the situation ?

Only if you could take the responsibility of your thoughts and actions in that situation and ask yourself

What could I have done differently, taking the responsibility of the situation , that could have made a difference ?

Now look at the situation again, what is different in your thoughts ?

You will find that taking responsibility frees us from getting stuck or bound to the person and gives you the freedom to take charge and do something about it.

So don’t get hooked up in the blame game, be responsible and contribute.

Share your experiences with me.

Be Well

Coach Nupur


PS : Photographer : Michal Marcol, http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/Gestures_g185-Point_p13133.html